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This Soft Red Oblivion

by Tomorrow's Man

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1.
Sit Down 02:00
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You don’t need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Don’t even listen, simply wait. Don’t even wait. Be quite still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you. To be unmasked, it has no choice. It will roll in ecstasy at your feet. Inspired by Franz Kafka, The Zürau Aphorisms
2.
Unlike the Grieving Widow of Someone Else's Dream 04:13
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I’m listening to the space of sound between each seconds’ tick. I feel my heart beat; so motivated. I finger-twitch at a bottle or a trigger, both the same. When I’m told I’m ahold in a mid-life rut I chuckle, insane. I know I could leave any place I can be If my unknown wasn’t so fused to the space between; The second-ticks, relentless in the light of the full moon. Slip under the warm water; Hold breath and bathe. Slip under the warm water; Hold breath and breathe. I’m my own excuse for mediocrity in my strongest time of need. I’m my own feint of passivity, blessed by a chance to grieve. I’m my own dead-space, an undrawn dread yawning in the stillness wide. At the end of my race I won’t refuse to shake the illness aside.
3.
Articulated in Bloom 04:42
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I dreamt I brought you a spine of roses articulated in bloom Handed the bouquet to you, and felt the elements fill the room Coursing through our veins of ice, now rich with fire and flame In my dream I brought you a spine of roses articulated in bloom A petal fell with a clatter to your lap, and just like that, we were changed Where forms had cast mad shadows in the light; now only spectres remain A transformation brought us back to life, not that we’d ever left When the petal fell with a metal clatter to your lap, everything changed. I grip at the brittle earth beneath our feet, while you carry the cold of space Flames feed veins and roots carry shoots through the vast black in our brains You pierce the skin of the sun for me to feel that we are free to feed While you carry the cold of space to heat where I kneel in elemental need. The thickness of the grief we secrete devours the sea; The thickness of the thieves we forgive consumes me. I’m quick as a shot with a smile, but it’s not what’s on the inside Pull the flesh from my head, and see the secret I hide Ticking away like a bomb, with the patience of a tomb I’m quick as a shot with a smile, but it’s not what’s on the inside.
4.
A Fleeting Instance 03:04
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Give up again Just let it end Become a fleeting instance of dissonance Not letting go keeps her paid real Not realizing your love is her pain Not accepting your soul is her pain Letting go is the only way to heal her
5.
No Matter What 02:44
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I remember seeing a mess of leaves skitter in the wind skitter skitter into the creek, and float rapidly toward the sea and I felt a nameless horror even then of Oh my God I felt a nameless horror even then of Oh my God I felt a nameless horror even then of Oh my God and I feel a nameless horror even now even now we're all being swept away to sea no matter what we know or say or do goodbye to the leaves goodbye to you and me Inspired by Jack Kerouac, Big Sur
6.
Complications of Consciousness 17:38
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Complications of Consciousness i. Dreamtime ii. Ailments of Combustion iii. Svaha Burn yourself down before you grow. Lose knowledge unfound before you know. Take to the sea to perfectly drown. Hold your last scream to hide the sound. Fight your battle to the end with gravity. Speed to the soil with alacrity. Just before the dark obscures your face Whisper your guilty plea. All the complications of consciousness, Mortality, insanity, entropy; The stark illusion of the promise of elusive bliss, Just a complication of consciousness. Walk an infinite line to spend your energy. Walk an infinite time to find what you need. Listen to your heart only as it slows down. Realize you missed the Dawn when it’s already sundown. All the complications of consciousness, The guarantee of the inevitable abyss; Desolation that lingers like your very last kiss, Just another complication of consciousness. When you awake, blissed and sublime And your dream dies with the loss of your mind Concentrate awhile, keep it alive Focus the desire of your dreamtime Walk an infinite line to spend your energy. Walk an infinite time to find what you need. Listen to your heart only as it slows down. Realize you missed the Dawn at sundown. Regretting the loss of all the things you miss: Just a complication of consciousness; The touch of love lost from your fingertips: Just a complication of consciousness; Dreamtime devoured by a life amiss: Just a complication of consciousness; When a shadow of yourself is all that exists, It’s just a complication of consciousness, Live a lie while dark and dead inside, Disconnect from the pull of the moon and tide; Living alive while dark and dead inside, Disconnected from the dreamtime.
7.
AND HOW! 05:00
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Do I really care about your pointless stare? And how! Do I really care about your pointless stare? And how! And how! Do I really care about your pointless stare? And how! And how! And— No longer have a need For the green in your hair No longer have a point All the words you bored No longer need to know Who’ll get to regret your foolish show Do I really need to care? And how! No longer have a need For your negative space No longer have a point The words spilling from your face No longer need to know When you’ll come, just when you’ll go
8.
Nothing from Your Mouth 04:25
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Sweet release from your philosophies, promises, entreaties that mean nothing from your mouth You speak of our memories, nostalgic soliloquies that mean nothing from your mouth How'd you get inside of me, what you want a part of me, How you gonna take it out now? Why you clawing into me, what you want the heart of me, How you gonna tear it out now? How you ply mendacity dripping with hypocrisy, Ruining the best of me. Claw your way out of me, take the red part of me, Have your fucking way with me now. Such sweet release from your disease, echoing guarantees That mean nothing from your mouth. Apocryphally you speak of me, ponder possibilities; That all mean nothing to me. Words of a charlatan, of a fool A sycophantic, trusting tool Left with nothing from your mouth. And so you leave me destitute Yet with a smile so acute, Blessed with nothing from you.
9.
Xes for Eyes 05:22
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"My luggage is only a flask, a wallet, an old cloak, and the obol that will pay my passage as the departed." Give me my xes for eyes, With what you've done I may already have died; Give me a smile and a reason why You puppeted me all of this time; Give me my xes for eyes You may as well have thrust me over the side; Give me a final moment of sanity One second of truth so I can rest in peace. Protect me from yourself – Protect me from your cagey smile Protect me from everything you hide Protect me from yourself – Protect me from your careful destruction Protect me from the things that made you mine, Your smiles, smiles and lies – your smiles, smiles and lies Protect me from yourself – Protect me from your cagey smiles Give me my xes for eyes No need for you to worry about my life; Give me a final smile to set me free, I’ll never know what that grin really means; Give me my xes for eyes, My desire worth the obol that keep me bound; Give me a kiss goodbye and your reason why You wasted so much of my time Protect me from your delicate blasphemies
10.
The Apocalypse Inside You 07:12
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Glitter bleeds from your diamond stitch As your peach-stone bribes the porter you suffer again An arch and a chill and a shiver and a clench and you pale pale pale pale pale An arch and the heat in a twist at your center And we’ll rise to a fevered pitch Finger in your heat catastrophe Fingers in the apocalypse inside you Finger in your slick blasphemy Fingers in the apocalypse inside you How I love that you’ve become my number one critic Never fail to ignore the fact of your clitic not a woman or the woman just woman to me My tempested lunatic There’s a clear dream in my mind That we’ll have to give in The minute we get to fuck In this lucid dream The end will begin The moment we get to fuck
11.
Soft, Red 01:42
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12.
Inside, Instead (for Nate) 15:40
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Inside, Instead: i. This Writhing Inside ii. This Bitternaked Conversation iii. This Soft Red Oblivion Burning, alive, intentions blind red sighs, lies, Xes for eyes. A writhing begins its twist inside. A writhing begins to twist inside. Phantoms flicker, writhe hues only red and gray, Phantoms flicker and writhe inside. While burning and blind, we could wonder why. While burning and blind, we could cry. While burning and blind, we could pray. While burning and blind, we hide inside, Instead. The moon grinds down on the twin sticks of our spines. A column of salt cools our scars to shards; This is the sickness of desire This is the sickness of desire This is the sickness This bitternaked conversation between you and I While burning and blind, we could wonder why. This bitternaked conversation between you and I While burning and blind, we could cry. This bitternaked conversation between you and I While burning and blind, we could pray. This bitternaked conversation between you and I In this soft red oblivion The lightning outside...cuts the Earth to sand. The cooling sand...scars to glass. Glass catches the lightning creates softsharp red shards in the shape of our hands. In the shape of our hands. The hands open and cutting. The hands outside this soft red oblivion. The hands outside embrace our delicate faces, hands closed and cutting. The hands outside grasp our delicate wrists, hands clenched and cutting. The hands outside form fury, form fists, hands crimson and cutting. Hands crimson and cutting. The heart beats inside. The blood pumps outside. The heart beats inside this soft red oblivion. The heart inside hold shards instead. The heart inside this soft red oblivion. The heat inside this soft red oblivion. We were glare, connected by a vein of silver. We were a bared-teeth rictus of talismen. We were the fire outside scarred shards of skin. Now we're a bitternaked conversation, instead. We were fingernails scratching VOODOO into glass. We were Eminent Domain between shaking legs. We were the skin outside cast in a slash. Now we're causal casualties, instead. We were furious and blindly feeding. We were candle flames, then cobalt hands. We were the storms outside, we were shards of lightning. Now we're cooling crimson inside, instead. Now we're cooling around our shards, instead. Now we're cooling around our scars, instead.

about

c.2018 Magic Angry Mouse Music

Recorded 2010, 2014-2018 @
The Gathering Room • Wisconsin
The Perch • Seattle, WA
The Intercontinental • Prague, CZ

This Soft Red Oblivion is dedicated to Nathan Marx

credits

released April 27, 2018

Produced, recorded, mixed by Tomorrow’s Man

Bass on Complications of Consciousness by Brett Holinbeck

Photography by Marianne Lachance, Ornans, France

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Tomorrow's Man Seattle, Washington

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